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April 12, 2002

Add this to things I like about Perry: Those nice wide parking lanes around the square. Among other things, they make it easy to open your car door without dinging the car next to you. Things I donít like: People making U-turns or left turns in the middle of the block around the square and elsewhere. Donít they know thatís against the law?

Our local housing situation is looking better. Iíve seen at least two new starts here in town and interest has been revived in some of the better homes that have been on the market for a while. I understand that one of the new starts is for an Edmond lady who was pleased with what she found on a weekend visit here. She decided she wants to live here and be a part of the congeniality that was shown to her. Thatís good to hear.

Perry Carnegie Library shelves are crammed with good reading. Here are a couple of very brief new books to lighten your day: Kill Duck Before Serving, a compilation of corrections printed by The New York Times through the years; and I Really Didnít Say Everything I Said, a rollicking collection of malapropisms supposedly from the tongue of the celebrated wordsmith and former New York Yankee, Yogi Berra. Both books are quick reads.

A reader passes along the following. I found it amusing and probably you will, too. Itís entitled: ďSo you thought you were tough enough to try to learn English?Ē This little treatise on the lovely language we share is only for the brave. It was passed on by a linguist, original author unknown. Peruse at your leisure, English lovers. Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?