August 17, 2004
Coaxing a smile or two
Here's another contribution from a reader, the purpose of which is to coax a smile or two for this day. They tickled my funny bone. Hope you enjoy them, too.
You may not know that many inanimate (non-living) things, have a gender. For example...
Zip-loc bags. They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.
Copiers. They are female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.
Tire. Male, because it goes bald and it's often over-inflated.
Hot Air Balloon. Male, because to get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it, and, of course, there's the hot air part.
Sponges. Female, because they're soft, squeezable, and they retain water.
Web page. Female, because they're always getting hit on.
Subway. Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.
Hour Glass. Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.
Hammer. Male, because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have it around.
Remote Control. Female...Ha! You thought it would be Male. But consider this: It gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying.
And that's the information-sharing experience for today. Let's meet here again in a few days.